What? Oh that presidential thing is coming up this year? I had no idea. Nor do I care. Seriously.
I’m talking about the NBA All-Star voting. You better get your ballots filled out and submitted. I already sent mine in. I did the paper form so I could write-in James Harden at every position. (Dude is straight merkin’ everyone I play in fantasy basketball this year!)
You need to get your ballot out soon, but first let’s go through what was buzzin’ on Twitter this past week.
Soft Breasts, Flying Cake and Bad Sandwiches
YOU’RE MY BOY JAMES! Harden has been strong this year, but this fella has been strong for many years.
Congrats to Tim Duncan on accomplishing that feat. Crazy thing is he’s not even done yet.
Good luck to Duncan as we continue to watch his Hall of Fame resume grow. You know what else you should watch out for? Cake.
Kwame Brown and the Warriors were in town for that one. Of course we can’t let Kwame get away without a little hazing.
It’s not nice to wish injuries on players. Oh wait, he did get hurt for real?
Oh snap. I hope it wasn’t too bad.
Oh that’s bad. That’s bad on multiple levels, and it could get bad for more than just the Warriors.
But Brown didn’t suffer the only injury this week.
Wait, what? Are you serious? Why are people hurting their chest-icles?
Yes. Protect ya pecs. Apparently those two didn’t listen. Maybe Devil Stern, I mean David Stern should take some measures to protect the people that make him rich.
So Al Horford is out for the Hawks now, but they should still be in good shape. Right?
Yeah, you’re right. What was I thinking? Well this opens things up a bit in the East.
The playoffs are still too far away to worry about right now. We have a more pressing issue.
I guess it helps to have strong breasts. It also helps to know what you want on your Subway sandwich before you get in line.
You guys take all that time and you’re still not happy.
And don’t try to blame your poor decisions on us or expect us to care about your crappy sandwich.
Now I’m hungry. Let’s finish this up.
#5 Back to the topic of the All-Star voting this year, Marcel Mutoni is very surprised about the voting already. Get more from Mutoni be clicking here.
#4 The New York Knicks are still gelling as a team, but Russ Bengtson seems to be a little impatient. Follow Russ here.
#3 I got nothing on this one. Ladies and Gentlemen, the mind of Marcel.
#2 Toney Douglas should print this out, frame it, and treasure it forever because nobody will ever say anything cooler about him than this. The netw3rk brings it, follow it here.
#1 I haven’t watched Space Jam in at least 10 years. I feel out of touch. Although, Myles Brown is probably thinking way too much about it. You can follow him here.
Basketball is not my life, but humor is. A little controversy doesn't hurt either. That's why Shatter the Glass has employed me to construct the Twitter Takeover. Each week I will bring you the hottest news and funniest tweets via Twitter. Enjoy.